The Ratty Tatty Quest
by snowbook22
Summary: The Sequel To Peek into the Past! Harry's Went back to his time but not without leaving a hinting note. James and Lily gets closer and Lord Voldemoldy has sneaked into Hogwarts! Sirius is still upset about his cookies! Little JxL! Really RANDOM! On Hold
1. She's Got BIG Issues

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry potter but like all crazy fans... We wish!**

A/N: I posted the Sequel! Yay! A job well done in my opinion! Maybe i should get a beta... So contact me if you want to be my Beta! Still i dun know how beta systems work... hehehe But Review! And i'll update VERY soon but only IF you Review! 

**_The Ratty Tatty Quest_**

**From peek into the past:**

"_Harry! Why didn't you tell us!? We're your friends!" James reasoned, "We didn't know you were moving mate."_

"_What about the cookies Harry? What are we going to do about the poor cookies!!?" Sirius cried and ran off hugging a box of cookies._

"_Harry sorry… Excuse me…" Moony replied and ran off after a crazy cookie lover Sirius._

"_Harry… Now I know why you were so depressed this morning… I'll miss you buddy…" Lily said with a sad smile, "Now I don't have a study partner…"_

"_I could always be your study partner lily!" James smiled slyly._

"_In your dreams Potter! It will never happen!" Lily flicked her hair back as she turned and stomped off._

"_Yeah mate… Sorry you have to go…" James smiled and ran off after Lily._

_-------------------------------_

_Thinking about the note he left for the marauders that said "Goodbye guys have to go. By the way… The rat is the sneakiest, watch your back. You'll regret it in the future."_

**So what actually happened to the Marauders when Harry left**** that note?**

**Chapter 1: Beginning Of Sightings**

"Hey Lily did you hear? Voldemoldy has been sighted again!" James whisper excitedly to lily that was busy writing a potion's essay not paying attention at all to what he was saying, "He was sighted near Hogwarts!!"

Lily looked up in shock "What? Near Hogwarts is he trying to break in?" Lily whisper furiously blushing when she saw a group of guys looking at James with jealousy. "Yeah I think some professor heard him in the forbidden forest laughing… insanely…" James whispered in a low voice making it ten times scarier than what he actually said. Lily shuddered "Well we better keep away from the forest eh?" Lily stuttered looking back at her potions essay, thinking "I wonder how Harry is doing at the new school…" not knowing that Harry was now back about thirty years in the future. When suddenly there was a loud… BOOM! "James… Please tell me that was a set up prank that just blew up and positively killing Sirius?" Lily cried looking out the window in alarm.

"Um… Lily it wasn't any prank we set up, we were planning one at the end of this month and none in between…" James mumbled shaking his head… but froze; they both turned around and said one word, "Voldemoldy…" They whispered and quickly packed their things and ran out of the library. Outside was total chaos screaming students, screaming professors, and screaming ghosts even, what the hell is with screaming ghosts?! Scanning the area and chaos, they quickly contacted Dumbledore who was in London drinking cups of tea with the Minister of Magic. "Oh my lord Dumbledore is not coming back for 2 weeks!" Lily screamed running around the common room with James trying to calm her down, "What is up with the wizardry world! I'm going for a walk, let's go!" Lily dragged James out for extra protection; they turned a corner and saw a swish of a black cloak disappear around another corner. "James was that who I thought it was?" Lily asked uncertain, James looked where the cloak was before answering, "Yes, can we follow him?" Lily shrugged and ran off with James to follow the suspicious character. They followed him toward 'her' toilet when… "Tom Riddle?" Her voice was trying to be seductive, "Is that really you?"

"Holy Crap no! Run for my life!" Lord Voldemoldy screamed running toward a shocked James and lily, "Minions!"

"Help me for Pete's sake!" Voldemoldy cried hiding behind Lily and looking at where 'she' was with a frightened look on his face, "Oh tom you really know you can't hide from me!" Moaning Myrtle laughed bitterly, "Come… BACK to me you bastard!!" She chased after a James, a lily and a lord Voldemoldy, all were sure she had very 'big' issues. "Minions fight her god damn it! Fight her for the great lord Voldemort!" Lord Voldemoldy cried running like a chicken. "Fight her yourself I'm not fighting her she'll kill me!" James yelled gasping for air but then jumps out of the way and hides behind a wall with Lily.

"You big fat chicken! Most people would be most honoured to serve me!! So just help me!!!" Voldemoldy screamed, "Don't you dare hide behind that wall of mush and fight like a man!" He ran faster as Myrtle was catching up.

"We could say the same to you! You're a big fat chicken! Why don't you be a man and not be a stupid evil bad guy?!" Lily screamed angrily huffing and puffing trying to regain her breathe. They heard a loud thud and dragging sounds they both thought at the same time "How can moaning Myrtle drag him?! She's just a ghost…" They both cautiously moved toward the dragging sounds, but then sighed in relief it was just flinch… Oh… Crap… "Uh oh… Run!!" They both said and fled before Flinch could see who was there. They ran pass fifth corridor where they bumped into peter, lily fell on her butt "Wormtail? What are you doing out this late?" James demanded quietly helping Lily up.

"Oh! James I was at the kitchens eating stuff …" Peter muttered looking around shiftily, "What were YOU doing out so late? A secret date with Lily eh?"

"Nah… though I wished! We saw the Lord Voldemoldy! He's a big fat chicken running away from moaning myrtle." James grinned, "Come on let's go before Flinch catches us!" Lily and peter nodded and they all ran back till they ran out of breath. "Well… It's not everyday Lord Voldemoldy comes into Hogwarts… Wait a minute! He's still in here!" Lily said shocked that they forgot this information, "We might see him again… Oh… Crap!"

**A/n: So how was it? Like? Hate? Beview! Still looking for Beta! Review and I update REAL... SOON!**


	2. Oh My Lovely Pineapple!

**Disclaimer: Nope! Don't own harry potter at all!! Nada! Though... it would have been fun... -sighs-**

**A/n: Wow! It was an Almost new record on how fast i typed this chapter... Though sadly my internet went dead alll of a sudden so thats i'm updating now! Wow... 2 reviews!! That's the real reason i'm so slow -shifty eyes- Review!!**

**Chapter 2****: Oh my lovely Pineapple!**

_As everyone knows Sirius ran away from Harry in Peek into the past screaming about the choc chip cookies and Remus went after him. He has not recovered from the loss of his cookie buddy._

**So what is he going to do to get his mind off the cookies?**

"Moony! I have finally found some other object to take my mind off the cookies!" Sirius cried smiling at Moony who was looking at the pineapple in his hand, "Meet my new darling Pineapple!"

"Pineapple… What sort of name is that?" Remus sighed turning back to the book he was reading, "But then again cookies had the name cookies…"

"Yes! I have finally got over those evil cookies all because of my lovely pineapple! Oh my lovely Pineapple you are so divine!" Sirius sighed looking at the pineapple lustfully while walking out of the common room muttering, "Yes you are, you cute little thing, yes you are!" Remus shut his book after he heard Sirius talking to the pineapple his mouth was hanging open in shock that his friend was falling in love with a PINEAPPLE! He immediately got up and went after Sirius, he had to find Sirius until 'that' happened or else… He shuddered at the thought.

When Remus was searching for Sirius in the third corridor and looked in an empty classroom… Sirius had just turned around a corner in the fifth corridor where… Lord Voldemoldy was hiding from moaning Myrtle yet again. "What are YOU doing in my hiding spot minion?" Lord Voldemoldy asked glaring at Sirius and the pineapple.

"No… What are YOU doing in MY Love spot?" Sirius cried glaring at lord Voldemoldy and muttering to 'pineapple' to glare at him too.

"I am the great lord Voldemort! So get out of my lair!" Lord Voldemoldy said trying to look as great as possible.  
"Ha! Yeah right! This is pineapple and my Love lounge so get out!" Sirius yelled pouting.

"I'll kill that pineapple! Darn it for stealing my lair!" Lord Voldemoldy screeched snatching pineapple from Sirius's grasp.

"You dare kill my darling pineapple and I'll kill you myself!!" Sirius growled taking out a machine gun. But Voldemoldy had already stepped on the pineapple turning it into mush… It was too late. "You bastard I'll make sure you die a slow painful death you little bitch!" Sirius sobbed and pulled the trigger killing lord Voldemoldy….

And that's how Sirius Black accidentally killed a 9th Horcux and how nobody knew the horcux existed is still unknown till this day. Remus found Sirius crying in a corner in the library sobbing about how much he forced himself to love the pineapple and how he still loved his poor Choc chip cookies… While he was dragging Sirius back from the library he bumped into peter who very shiftily said he was out for a night stroll. They then met Lily and James in the common room muttering quietly to each other.

"Hey you two love birds by any chance do you have any spare choc chip cookies? Sirius needs them." Remus sighed dumping Sirius on a sofa, Sirius was sobbing quietly to himself, "A person that had a black cloak had killed his new love 'pineapple' he said the person was pretending to be Lord Voldemort" Remus rolled his eyes and sat down on a sofa next to Sirius, Peter went up to bed already. That got James and Lily's attention, "You mean he killed that person then?" James asked frowning and Lily looked at Sirius like he was crazy.

"Obviously he did, like that time he killed that mouse that stole his 'beloved cheese' with a machine gun that appeared out of nowhere '' Remus yawned, "Well I'm going to go to bed, night!" He went to bed leaving James and Lily to look after Sirius who was now sucking his thumb. They just looked at him, and Sirius looked back with his puppy eyes making them flinch. "I think I'll go get him the choc chip cookies…" Lily muttered disappearing for ten minutes, when she came back with a box of cookies Sirius held out his hand mumbling,

"I want a cookie" Lily rolled her eyes but handed Sirius the box anyway shaking her head in disbelief.

"Black… You have to tell me… About the person who killed your beloved pineapple," Lily whispered pretending to be pitiful, "I'm sorry we have to force you to tell us but this entire ordeal is too sad…"  
Sirius nodded puppy eyeing still he nibbled one of the choc chip cookies, "Well the bastard! He killed my darling! He was saying he was the great lord Voldemort and everything… not so great anymore!" Sirius laughed a little James grinned and Lily cracked a smile.

"But wait… Doesn't that mean Sirius killed lord Voldemort?" Lily asked while Sirius mouth dropped open.

"You mean he WAS the real Voldemort?" Sirius asked in disbelief shaking his head and grabbed another cookie.

"Well… Yeah I think… I mean…Lily and I bumped into him a couple of days ago… He was running away from Moaning Myrtle," James said frowning, "If he WAS Lord Voldemoldy… He's dead then."

"Whoa! I can't believe I actually KILLED the really great dark lord who knows dark powers normal people don't know… Oh wait! I killed him with a machine gun" Sirius smiled, "I'm having sweet dreams tonight! Oh and about the pineapple… I never loved it, the cookies rule all!"

Lily, James and Sirius jumped up suddenly and cried "All hail the holy cookies!!" waking up the whole of Hogwarts with their cry.

**Review please! Love? Hate? Want me to stop? Review! I'll update faster! :P**


	3. Attack of the Giant Evil Icecream

_**A/n: Sorry for taking heaps long for this chapter!! I'll try to update quicker but in 2 days i'm going on hoildays!!  
Soo... Yeah! might take next update a bit to get here! Enjoy!**_

**_Disclaimer: Harry Potter... Don't own it! But a girl can dream!_**

_**Chapter 3: Attack of the Giant Purely Evil**__** Ice-cream**_

_In Peek into the past, Dumbledore had his password as corn thins for a VERY long time, until Harry went back to his time then changed it to chicken pox._

**But what will happen when someone else's favourite food gets annoyed that Dumbledore didn't choose it instead?**

"Oh my holy lords help me!" Sirius yelled out into the common room in a very desperate voice, "All the choc chip cookies disappeared!" Lily, James, Remus and peter **(for once)** looked up rolling their eyes.

"Well… Come to think of it I heard the house elves saying that someone stole this month's breakfast," Lily said thoughtfully, "Could there be some monster stealing food from Hogwarts?"

"Lily, Lily… You have spent too much time with the marauders! I mean come on, a monster? It wouldn't even get inside Hogwarts because of Dumbledore!" Alice rolled her eyes at lily's statement and turned back to her essay sighing.

"Has anyone even paid attention to me?" Sirius screamed desperately, "I NEED my sugar fix! I'll go crazy!" Sirius fell to the ground running around in a circle making him looking like a clock…Sort of.

"Gob, gob, gob gobble!" Something cried out suddenly, every ones' head turn where the noise was heard and gasped…

It was a TURKEY!

"Um… Does anyone understand turkey language?" Alice asked frowning at the turkey, Sirius nodded.

"I read memorized a book called 'talk to the turkey' I've learnt pretty much what their talking about…" Sirius said briskly turning to the turkey, everyone was looking at them, "Gobble gob, goby?"

"Gobble gob goby gob gobble!" The turkey cried sadly, their conversation would actually look very funny if Sirius didn't have a serious face, "Gobble…"

Sirius turned back to the crowd which just consisted of Lily, Alice, Frank, James and Remus, Peter had disappeared again, "The turkey's name is Gob and he says something strange is happening to all the animals' food."

"Huh? But why didn't the animals send one of the creatures that could actually talk our language?" Lily asked confused.

"Gobble gob gobble?" Sirius frowned, the turkey blinked, "Gobble…"

Sirius rolled his eyes as he turned back to face the group saying, "He didn't think of that…"

Sirius and Gob started a long conversation which lasted for 2 hours, Sirius was writing down notes in a brand new notebook which said something like…

_Ice-cream has taken over the world__ of the food, must save the world with Moony and Prongs. Must save to world by defeating the giant ice-cream of doom. _

Sirius suddenly closed the note book, the turkey and Sirius ran away and James and Remus looked after them rolling their eyes.

**-Dun, Dun, DUN!-**

Sirius jumped out from under a chair holding a water pistol and a detective hat with a coat yelling, "Okay I am ready to kill the Ice-cream of doom!" James and Remus jumped in shock.

"Where did you get that?" James asked raising one eye in question, Remus studied the detective coat and hat which was still very new.

"Oh I just borrowed it from Miss. B Swan in Washington she only used it once at Christmas!" Sirius smiled proudly, "Now let's go!"

"Uh… Okay then since we have spare time anyway…" James frowned, grabbing his wand and invisibility cloak from a conveniently set-up hook on the wall and following Sirius out the door. Remus sighed... "Do I have to do this?" He said to himself before running after James and Sirius.

**-Many hours later-**

After many hours searching for the evil lair of the giant evil Ice-cream of doom, The Marauders (not including Peter) ended up in the forbidden forest.

"Ouch you stepped on my toe!" James hissed kicking Sirius in the shin and glare at Remus who was trying very hard not to laugh.

"Sh! I think I've found something!" Sirius said sniffing around and ran into some further clump of bushes.

"Wait up!" James called diving into the bushes where Sirius disappeared to and his face collided with something big, smooth and hard! James rubbed his face and looked up…

There was a giant fridge standing up to about 80 ft high!

"Whoa…" Remus breathed when he discovered the giant formation, inspecting the door by tapping it three times.

The door started to open very slowly blowing out freezing cold wind which Remus and James found very odd… Since it wasn't plugged in.

Sirius inspected his gun making sure it was ready to fire when needed and posed, "Stay back innocent people Sirius the Serious Secret Agent is here to save the day!" He said trying to make his voice deep but failing miserably.

So they ventured in…

They found giant steps and started to climb jumping at every little sound… like their own footsteps… As mist covered the path in front of them.

Suddenly…

"Fee-cream fry-cream Foe-cream thumb-cream!" Boomed a loud voice, "Who dares to intrude on my frozen Ice-land of crap?"

James snorted before he could stop himself; Remus cracked a smile and Sirius… He had a very determined expression on his face holding his water gun he advanced towards the loud voice.

The mist cleared and in front of them stood… A giant scoop of ice-cream!

"Oh my god!" James sighed mouth watering at the thought of eating this giant scoop, Remus nodded sighing as well but Sirius aimed his water gun and glared at the giant scoop.

"I am the giant ice-cream of doom! Hear me roar!" The blob of ice-cream said jumping around, James's mouth dropped open… It talked! The ice-cream talked he could make A **LOT** of money with this!

Sirius ran forward and pressed the trigger… But the water in his water pistol was frozen solid.

James & Remus took out their wands and together they cried, "Accio spoons!" Almost instantly spoons flew to their hands and they looked at the ice-cream greedily.

"Wh-what are you doing with spoons?!" the ice-cream cried looking frightened for once, "Don't come near me!"

James and Remus jumped at the ice-cream of doom scooping at random places and eating at the ice-cream fast ignoring the screams of agony coming from the ice-cream itself.

"I thought of that!" Sirius said shifty eyeing, "Of course good job minions!"

James and Remus rolled their eyes and the group travelled back to the castle, James and Remus very satisfied with their late midnight snack.

"I wonder what will be next. Pancake? Or maybe chicken pie!" James smiled at the thought.

Voldemort spied on them from afar… "No! They ate my snack! Damn those rebellious minions!"

So… The ice-cream didn't take over the world of food… And Sirius got his cookies and his sugar fix.

**Review!!! Please! Oh and i'm opening a new poll... What story should i continue? Please vote!  
Next chapter: Chapter 4: Voldemoldy's Secret Obsession with Pokemon!**


	4. Secret Obsession with Pokemon

**A/n: Yay! I finally got this chapter finished had a major writers block and all but i'm back in action!! Sort of...  
This idea came to me randomly because i don't even like pokemon much anymore...But anyway enjoy and don't forget to review~**

_**Chapter 4: **__**Voldemoldy's Secret Obsession with Pokemon**_

_In Peek into the past Voldemort never showed up in the past when Harry was there. No articles saying he had killed anyone no anything. _

**So what was he so obsessed with to make him stop killing people for a long period of time?**

At last! At last Voldemort had gotten his hands on…

The rare deck of Pokemon trading cards!

"My precious… All mine!" Voldemort cried waving the deck around and jumping from excitement, he could finally trade with those snobby Pokemon card traders!

Voldemort laughed and his deck of card accidentally slipped from his hand and fell out an open window! Voldemort let out a cry he was on the seventh floor!

The cards fell down very fast and plopped itself into Lily Evan's open bag! Voldemort flew down the stairs and searched all around for his 1 billion dollar cards but they were nowhere to be found… Lily had gone to class already.

Voldemort ran to hogsmeade and went to a newly open internet café! He jumped on and went to a Pokemon chat room to ask people to help him, logging into his account 1229DaRkmaGicSz….

**1229DaRkmaGicSz:** Hello! I just bought a 1 billion dollar deck of trading cards! I lost them! Can someone help?

**PoKeThEmO****N:** Laughing my ass off man! You totally lost it! Haha –snort-

Voldemort logged out scarred for life… What a bunch of dorks these Pokemon fans are…Well **MOST** of them anyway.

He ran back to the castle looking for his precious cards, those cards took 5 years to deliver and those pokedorks didn't help at all!

Voldemort sniffed the air… He had only got them for ten seconds but he remembered the smell of the fresh cards… The smell had come from… The potion dungeon!

Voldemort practically flew to the potions classroom where a lesson was going on **(of course)** and professor Slughorn jumped up in shock!

"Students evacuate!" Slughorn yelled, pushing the students out the door… It wasn't everyday the greatly _**'Feared'**_ Dark lord came crashing into a classroom.

"No! I won't let you escape until I have my deck of Pokemon cards!!" Voldemort screeched snatching Frank Longbottom by the arm, "You boy! Do you know who has my 1 billion dollar deck of cards?!"

"Y-yes…" Frank stuttered, "I saw Lily Evans go to Hogsmeade with some cards just now but..."

Voldemort dropped Frank his mouth opened with terror… Hogsmeade… You would only go to Hogsmeade with a deck of cards… To sell, "I just came from there!" Voldemort groaned running back the way he came he looked around leaving no stone unturned… She was not there!!

"That evil minion!" Voldemort yelled, "He lied! To me! The great feared dark lord!"

"There, there have a lollypop," said Lily Evans holding out a lollypop.

"Wait a minute! You have the cards! Where are they?" Voldemort screeched grabbing her lollipop as Lily blocked her ears.

"James took them!" Lily yelled back crossing her arms, "I wanted to sell them, but no! He just had to go take them up to his personal experiment lab, doesn't he know that everything that goes there doesn't come out alive or in one piece?"

Voldemort groaned in frustration.

**---****-----**

"Yes! I have my hands on that gay deck of cards," thought James laughing and ran down a passage to get to his experiment lab.

He quickly put on his goggle and started up the fire, taking out a tool kit called: So you're playing with fire, for 5-6 year olds.

Sirius had also gotten a few "secret" ingredients himself for them to use.

Grabbing the deck of Pokemon cards he dumped it into a large beaker and lighted a Bunsen burner crackling evilly.

He then rampaged the kit and took out some sugar crystals, baking powder, some baboon skin, powdered goat's horn and last but not least… a unicorn's tail hair which caused Sirius a black eye for 2 months when he pulled it off a passing unicorn… Well he **DID **pull the whole tail off…

James got a jug of water and was about the dump it into the beaker when… **CRASH!**

Voldemort crashed through the door wand in hand; he looked in horror at his cards that were just about to get soaked with James's jug of water.

"Accio water," Voldemort yelled frantically waving his wand around… **SPLASH!**

"No!! My robe! I meant with the jug not just the water!" Voldemort screeched, James ducked under the table. Voldemort snatched the cards out of the beaker with relief and ran out the door happily sighing, "I finally have my Pokemon cards back!"

James had crawled out from under the table looking confused, "Pokemon cards? Those aren't Pokemon cards those are…"

"Digimon cards!" Voldemort screamed in fury, "What happened to my Pokemon cards?!"

**-Later that night-**

Lily Evans slipped into the common room with pure joy she hadn't sold her Digimon cards but she found later on in the day Pokemon cards in her bag which got her 1.5 billion in the auction.

**Review and i'll give you a cookie! :) I forgot to open a poll last time but i'm opening it now!  
Next Chapter: Chapter 5: Whoa is that the TITANIC?!  
(Watched the Titanic a few days ago...)**


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